Yes, there are real, true limitations but most of us will never come against those real limitations because we stop far short of that level of accomplishment.
Our brain says “I can’t” and we believe it, so we don’t really strive. We settle.
Here’s the thing – if we KNEW about our incorrect, subconscious limiting beliefs, we would do something about them and push harder, keep trying.
But by definition we don’t know, so we stop.
This is why we seek out coaches to support us and look from the outside in, telling us, yes, actually, you can. AND, showing us HOW. Because often, the reason why we haven’t been able to do something is that our skills and knowledge aren’t where they need to be to achieve that level of greatness.
A few weeks ago I reached out to an old friend who is a ridiculously awesome trainer and super human calisthenics and body weight exercise expert — the sh*t Al can do blows my mind. I have seen him doing this all of these years, but literally consciously and also subconsciously have always thought, “There ain’t any way in hell I can do that.”
Let me jump back for a moment: as part of my journey over the last few years, I have been very committed to rooting out as much of my limiting beliefs as possible, and have a laundry list of things that I once thought that I could never do (and very much used to not be able to do) that I can now do… many things took YEARS of consistent practice, patience and positivity around because it really did seem objectively reasonable to think that maybe I actually could never do it… little things like being flexible enough to get my head to my knees in a straight leg forward stretch literally took about four years of consistent work to accomplish, or, being able to get one foot up when I was in a bridge — I remember the first time I got my TOE off the ground for even a second, I was beyond excited because that was after a year of committed practice — now I can do it on the paddle board! Silly examples, sure, but how you do one thing is how you do everything! So yeah, you have to be patient, you have to put consistent massive work in the direction of what you are trying to accomplish, and you have to keep a positive attitude after repeated failure (like, daily failure for years — you can’t let that convince you to give up!).
And, sometimes, you need a coach. Because what I KNOW is that if I were aware of the incorrect self limiting beliefs that I hold, I would already be working on them… and, there are lots I can’t see… that a coach will see and help me SMASH.
Enter Al Kavadlo. You can check out some of his stuff here at his website alkavadlo.com
. I was working with another trainer actually in Malaysia (long story) who gave me a list of resources that were top notch and Al was on the list — I hadn’t seen Al in years but thought it was so cool that some random trainer out of Malaysia was sharing his stuff so I sent him a note letting him know that his stuff was getting around and appreciated… I then realized that training with Al would DEFINITELY get me out of my comfort zone, because the thought occurred to me and felt ill in my stomach. That is a clue that I have some fear! (And then I am able check in and see if that fear is of service and I can tell that no, I will not be in any actual grave danger, just my ego and sense of pride might be LOL. so, I know it is a good idea that will bring growth!) Because seriously, the stuff Al does I cannot do. BUT, working with Al has given me the Aha-s around areas that I was either ignorant (wait it is my hands and shoulders that I need to be relying on, not my core, in that move?!?!) or where I can get stronger/ more functional in my training/ fitness… in addition to giving me the confidence to move out of my comfort zone and smash some of my old limiting beliefs. Maybe someday I will be able to do some of what Al can do:
The point is this: getting a coach is AWESOME, and not just in the area of physical fitness. There are ALWAYS ways that we are missing how we are looking at the situation incorrectly (believing something to be true that isn’t true) or ways that we can be more skillful or more knowledgeable in handling our life. ALL AREAS OF OUR LIFE. Work, relationships, happiness, fulfillment, health and fitness.
Getting a coach is a game changer. And, life is the biggest game we could be playing in. So, why wouldn’t you want a coach? Someone who can do things that you can’t do or that you *think* you can’t do? Or someone who you respect as being wise and skillful in the areas you want to level up?
I am so grateful for all of the coaches I have been lucky enough to work with and I wouldn’t be anywhere near as skillful and accomplished as I am without them. (humbly grateful) And, I encourage everyone to think about areas in which they are limiting themselves by not having a coach on their side.